I've realised that the reason I'm so impatient for my swelling to go down is because I'm worried that I won't like what's underneath, so I want to be able to see it now to reassure myself! I suppose I feel like I look a bit odd when I smile, and I'm worried that it's not because of the swelling and that this is just my new face and I'll look odd forever! I know I'm probably just being silly, and if I was reading somebody else saying this I'd be like 'Don't be silly, it's only been a couple of weeks since your surgery', but sometimes it just suddenly hits me that this new face is forever and I think 'What if I don't like what's lurking beneath my chipmunk cheeks?!'
Last night I had a dream that I went out with people I used to go to uni with, and after a while I realised that none of them had even noticed that I looked different, and I was a little disappointed! I haven't really seen many people yet so I'm excited (and a bit worried) to get their reactions! I'm seeing a friend tomorrow so it will be interesting to see what her reaction is!
Today I've had a few aches and pains which is unusual. Earlier when I touched a certain place on my right cheek I got a pain going along my cheek bone to my TMJ, but it seems to have gone now. And I had a weird feeling sort of in a muscle at the back of my mouth (it's hard to explain) when I was rinsing with water. And my bottom teeth have been really tender. I've had to keep checking that I've put my bands on right because it feels like it's pulling more strongly than normal, and like my top teeth are pushing down too hard on my bottom teeth at the front.
Also I've gone back to putting ice on my face mainly just because I'm desperate to try and reduce the swelling.
Anyway, enough of my ramblings, here are my Day 17 pics. For once in my life I like my face more from the side than from the front.
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